Doubt…

“I just left the swim clinic and I don’t feel very fierce right now, in fact I cried a little bit when I got to my car.  My swimming is not good, I’m not spending enough time on the bike, and I didn’t run with my eyes closed and my hear open yesterday.”

This is the message I sent to my friend Scarlett this evening upon leaving a swim clinic that was hosted by a local tri-club.  I had just spent 2 1/2 hours in a pool feeling like I was doing every drill wrong.  At the end of the clinic I was trying my hardest not to cry in the pool, fierce women do not cry in the pool, and I was trying to be fierce.  When the very nice, and supportive coach asked if I had any up coming races I felt too doubtful to tell him that I was racing Ironman 70.3 Galveston in two months.  I mean come on what was I thinking?  I’m not an athlete; I was the kid in elementary school that couldn’t complete 3 loops of the obstacle course in the allotted time, after years of running I’ve yet to complete a sub 5 hour marathon and I just missed hitting my goal at the club 15k yesterday and the scale was up 5 lbs this morning and I’d wimped out of my bike ride yesterday because it was windy and cold.  How could I complete a 70.3? What was I thinking when I hit the registration button oh so many months ago?

Lucky for me, Scarlett was quick to pick up the phone and remind me of the many reasons why I can do this and that I will do this.  By the time I’d made it to my stop I was feeling more hopeful.  She reminded me that anything is possible, we just have to decided how badly we want to accomplish our goals and if I am going to be honest I want this.  I also want to complete a full 140.6 full Ironman.  I want to here Mike Reilly say, “Jennifer Fox, You Are an Ironman.”  As improbable as it might seem, this has been a secret goal of mine ever since I watched the first NBC Special of the World Ironman Championships from Kona a million years ago.  It was a dream I’ve had hidden so deep inside myself that it took 20 plus years to come out and only after meeting and befriending some pretty awesome people through the Dallas Running Club, who also understand the magic of Ironman.

So here I am, exactly two months away from standing at the start line in Galveston to swim 1.2 miles, bike 56 miles, and run 13.1 miles.  To be honest my swim and bike training have been less than stellar; however, my running has been solid and I have a fantastic endurance base. I CAN RUN! I can run a 25k at midnight in the middle of July in Ft. Worth, TX; I can run a half marathon at altitude and follow it up with a strenuous 6 mile hike in the Rockies.  I can swim 1200 yds in the morning, work all day, and then complete a track work out in the evening.  I am strong, my heart is strong, my will is strong, and I am going to do what I need to do to accomplish this goal.  Its not going to be easy, and I know that come race day I will have struggles and I’ll wonder why I thought this was a good idea, but I will press on because I am a fierce woman; because I want to be an example to my nieces and nephew that you can go after big, crazy dreams and succeed.  12194552_10153586380401201_8028141917248701014_o

So here we go, I thought this might be a good time to dust off the old blog and take some of you along for the journey. Ironman 70.3 Galveston, I’m coming for you! IMG_2774

About AuntJenFox

I'm a 45 year old single woman living in Dallas, TX. I'm a licensed nursing home administrator, runner, Aunt, and Mom to a Welsh Corgi puppy named Eloise and a cat named Gracie. My life is anything but boring and I learn something new everyday.
This entry was posted in running, triathalon, Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to Doubt…

  1. You can do it!!! I have great faith in you! You are a strong woman and I am so proud of you.

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